Vice President Rice?

This little blurb was to be found on the U.S. News and World Report website this afternoon. I will publish it, in its entirety and then I will comment at the end.

“Sparked by today's Washington Post story that suggests Vice President Cheney's office is involved in the Plame-CIA spy link investigation, government officials and advisers passed around rumors that the vice president might step aside and that President Bush would elevate Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice.

“‘It's certainly an interesting but I still think highly doubtful scenario,’ said a Bush insider. ‘And if that should happen,’ added the official, ‘there will undoubtedly be those who believe the whole thing was orchestrated – another brilliant Machiavellian move by the VP.’

“Said another Bush associate of the rumor, ‘Yes. This is not good.’ The rumor spread so fast that some Republicans by late morning were already drawing up reasons why Rice couldn't get the job or run for president in 2008.

“‘Isn't she pro-choice?’ asked a key Senate Republican aide. Many White House insiders, however, said the Post story and reports that the investigation was coming to a close had officials instead more focused on who would be dragged into the affair and if top aides would be indicted and forced to resign.

“‘Folks on the inside and near inside are holding their breath and wondering what's next,’ said a Bush adviser. But, he added, they aren't focused on the future of the vice president. ‘Not that, at least not seriously,’ he said.”

OK, god, where do I begin? First of all, is this woman even remotely qualified? She has never run in an election for anything before. For all we know, she could, quite literally be a tax-dodging, illegal immigrant hiring, lesbian, dwarf-lover. And while only the first, I believe, disqualifies one from being Vice President, the point is a good one. She has never been questioned thoroughly about her beliefs on any number of issues. Is that supposed to happen when the Republican Congress rubber-stamps her within a heartbeat of the Presidency.

Secondly, does anyone really believe that Dick Cheney is stupid enough to have implicated himself in this leak? Even if he did have knowledge of the leak, the information would have gone through so many intermediaries that getting to Cheney would be like trying to bust Tony Soprano.

Neo-Conservatives have pitched a fit about Harriet Mier being a Supreme Court Justice because not enough is known about her. Well, we know plenty about Condi Rice; she is, in fact, pro-choice as the “Republican staffer” asked. Rice is also pro-Affirmative Action. Those are two great big no-no’s with the neo-con set.

This rumor should be treated like the total rubbish that it is. While she has the perfect performance record of consistent mistakes and verbal gaffs to get a promotion from the President, this rumor is just something to fill a “slow” news day. It is something for the people in ridiculous pin-stripe suits in DC to talk about over their Ketel One Martinis at Happy Hour. Perhaps, instead of dealing in the hypothetical the lazy Fourth Pillar of our government could cover some real news, like Tom Delay getting fingerprinted. Now that is news!