Let’s go through the speech, line by line, and pull out all the references to policy (using as generous a definition of policy as possible) and the Republican vision.

“To the families of special-needs children all across this country, I have a message: For years, you sought to make America a more welcoming place for your sons and daughters.

“I pledge to you that if we are elected, you will have a friend and advocate in the White House.”

How so, what proof is there that John McCain supports services and assistance to the parents of special needs Children?  What does the record reflect.  Well, I went to the Senate website and did a little historical research on his voting record.  It ain’t pretty.  As with most things, McCain is a man who likes to say no.  That is fine for a legislator and it is good to vote against bills that have good intentions but fall short of being effective in implementation.  But if you truly stand for something you find your own approach.  That isn’t McCain’s style.  He is a No-man.  You can’t go to the White House and simply sit and say no.  You have to provide a vision!  What do you want to accomplish?

“A writer observed: ‘We grow good people in our small towns, with honesty, sincerity, and dignity.’ I know just the kind of people that writer had in mind when he praised Harry Truman.  I grew up with those people.”

Please tell me that the Rube wasn’t comparing herself to President Truman.  Truman was Vice President for only two months before he became President, but he served as a Senator for ten years before that.  While in the Senate he served as chairman, Special Committee to Investigate the National Defense Program in the Seventy-seventh and Seventy-eighth Congresses.  Please Rube, you are not Harry Truman!

“They are the ones who do some of the hardest work in America ... who grow our food, run our factories, and fight our wars.”

…and city folks are lazy, gay, God hating, over-educated liberal scum?  Pretty sure there are a few factories in our cities too.  Most of them, in fact.

“[People in small towns] love their country, in good times and bad, and they're always proud of America. I had the privilege of living most of my life in a small town.”

…and city folks are all terrorist sympathizers.  In 2005, 80% of Americans lived in urban areas (According to the United Nations World Urbanization Prospects: The 2007 Revision, urban area is defined as “densely settled territory that meets minimum population density requirements and encompasses a population of at least 2,500 inhabitants. As of the 2000 census, the urban definition was changed from a placebased one to one based on density. However, this change has only a small effect on the comparability of estimates before and after 2000.)  By 2050, that number is projected to increase to over 90%.  25% of Americans live in rural America (urbanized areas are defined by the Census Bureau by population density. Generally, an urbanized area consists of a central city and surrounding areas whose population is greater than 50,000. In addition, other towns outside of an urbanized area whose population exceeds 2,500 are included in the urban population, leaving all other areas rural.”  My question is this.  Do you really want to write off a majority of the population as less than your hometown crew?

“I guess a small-town mayor is sort of like a ‘community organizer,’ except that you have actual responsibilities.”

This is just too good to be true.  We have spent years listening to Republicans tell us that social services should not be delivered by government, that social service nonprofits and faith based organizations can, should and will fill that role.  Obama left school and worked with churches and nonprofits as a community organizer.  Is the Rube now saying that her role in government was more important?  Isn’t there some saying about shoes on other feet?

“I might add that in small towns, we don't quite know what to make of a candidate who lavishes praise on working people when they are listening, and then talks about how bitterly they cling to their religion and guns when those people aren't listening.  We tend to prefer candidates who don't talk about us one way in Scranton and another way in San Francisco.”

Perhaps the Rube should have read the whole quote instead of taking it out of context.  The actual quote was:  “You go into these small towns in Pennsylvania and, like a lot of small towns in the Midwest, the jobs have been gone now for 25 years and nothing's replaced them. And they fell through the Clinton administration, and the Bush administration, and each successive administration has said that somehow these communities are gonna regenerate and they have not.

“And it's not surprising then they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy toward people who aren't like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment as a way to explain their frustrations.”

If she had bothered to get the context she would have realized that the quote, while poorly worded, wasn’t denigrating rural voters, but rather explaining where their frustration comes from.

“While I was at it, I got rid of a few things in the governor's office that I didn't believe our citizens should have to pay for.  That luxury jet was over the top. I put it on eBay. I also drive myself to work.  And I thought we could muddle through without the governor's personal chef - although I've got to admit that sometimes my kids sure miss her. I came to office promising to control spending - by request if possible and by veto if necessary.”

This is a nice story but it is ultimately irrelevant.  Gimmicks may save Alaska money.  Saving the U.S. tax payers money means making hard decisions.

“With Russia wanting to control a vital pipeline in the Caucasus, and to divide and intimidate our European allies by using energy as a weapon, we cannot leave ourselves at the mercy of foreign suppliers.”

She read this, but has no idea what it means!

“Starting in January, in a McCain-Palin administration, we're going to lay more pipelines ... build more new-clear plants ... create jobs with clean coal ... and move forward on solar, wind, geothermal, and other alternative sources.”

Wow, more of the old and then those hippie solutions as an after thought.  That is definitely the Change We Need!  If you don't have a forward solution, why the heck are you running.  How do you propose providing enough supply domestically?  How much of an increase would that require?  How will you move us off fossil fuel?  What incentives will you create to foster sustainability?  No discussion of the roots of the issue, just rhetoric.

“In politics, there are some candidates who use change to promote their careers.  And then there are those, like John McCain, who use their careers to promote change.”

Maybe it was my eight years in Communist Hollywood, but I would like to request a re-write of that line to convey more honesty.  How about this: In politics, there are some candidates who talk about change in terms of the future.  And then there are those, like John McCain, who use the past to promote change.”  Yup, that gets to it!

That was a lot shorter speech.  She could have cut it down and not wasted our time.  She totally cut into Seinfeld repeats (what us city folk, over-educated liberals cling to in this time of insanity).